Killin' Time

Currently I am sitting just about three and a half hours south of Sydney in the capital city of Canberra in the ACT (Australian Capital Territory). The reason for the trip further south was to escape the hustle and bustle of Sydney and to see some friends that I have down here. So far the trip has been uneventful with sprinkles of annoyances which have more to do with certain people here rather than experiences. But, nonetheless I will be back in Sydney by the end of the week with the direct objective of finding my way around and some self reflection.

I have a place to live now which is a bit off my plate and a relief that I have a place where I can go to rest my head, take a nap, watch a movie, whatever floats my boat really, and that to me, is priceless.

I found out today that work starts this upcoming tuesday which is great but I am still a little lost as to what I will be doing on a day to day basis, in due time this will become very apparent. I'm just hoping I don't screw up which is a natural feeling at this point in the game.

I can't help but feel a little discouraged in the fact that once one thing on "my list" of things to do gets taken off, it is replaced by something that is more significant in terms of the stress it comes with and the difficulty it has to accomplish being oh, 9,000 miles away. I'm doing my best to stay positive and take things as they come but at the same time I cannot shift the weight that these hurdles bear on me and how that stresses me out.

It also doesn't help I haven't had decent nights sleep in a week and am craving watching a movie whilst falling asleep ( a favourite pastime of mine). Soon enough...soon enough

Be back soon.

Landed in a land down under

I come from a land down under...wait thats not right, I mean, not to quote the men at work song but I'm "in" a land down under finally.

After eh, 26 hours or so of constant traveling I am finally in Sydney. I am currently in a hotel with my mom who decided to meet me down here and my friend Louise who lives here full-time. The first plan of attack is to A. enjoy the city and soak up some of the sights and B. solidify a place to live which if I'm honest has been the bain of my existence for over two months now. That said I have an appointment to check out a place this afternoon and with any luck (fingers crossed) this will be the end of my search.

Now that I'm here my trepidation about the whole situation is still very apparent and I still feel very hesitant about this whole on a few levels. Im afraid that I won't do a good job even though I know I will pick it up as i go along. I suppose I'm more worried and stressed about other things. Things that are slightly out my control but that occupy my mind nonetheless. Cest la vie I suppose.

Ever had that overwhelming feeling of being in a new place on the cusp of something new a significant but at the same time your mind is selfishly somewhere else? That's about where Im at now and I realize that sounds maybe pathetic or pedantic but unfortunately it's currently the dominant theme at the moment. My hope is that the longer I'm here and the more that I'm busy the quicker certain things will take a back seat in the priority list of my mind.

Anyway as I sit here sipping my koh-hee (J460 people will know what I'm talking about) and looking out on Hyde park and my day is about to begin I'm overwhelmed with the sense of anxiety and wonderment at the same time trying my best to carry some optimism into the next few days.

I know that in time things will smooth out and the things that are "supposed to happen will happen." Time to just give it some time to get adjusted into a rhythm. As Bob Marley said, everything's going to be alright.

Later.

Is this really happening??

So I'm told (by reputable sources of course) that it's best to be honest and vent how you feel, right?

OK, here goes...

WHAT IN THE HELL AM I DOING!!???

Ok, vented, out of the way.

I'm sitting in the Indianapolis airport having well, lets be honest a sub-par meal and I can't help but sit here and dwell on the fact that my journey to Sydney begins in oh, 35 minuets or so and if I'm honest (as I'm told its best to do) it scares the living crap out of me. Not only is this a massive change that snuck up on me quicker than a fit ninja in the night but it adds to the the stress that is already crowding the limited space that is my mind.

let me give you a rundown of the the events that have preceded this point if I may.

The stress of moving to a foreign country albeit exciting, terrifies me for the simple fact that despite my best efforts I still cannot find a damn place to live. There is also the teeny tiny fact that I don't know if I'm coming back to IU to finish my education. This fact by itself stressed me to the point of no sleep. Adding to this already magical amalgam of fun is that if it wasn't hard enough to say goodbye to the people that have made the biggest impact on me I had to say goodbye to someone yesterday that I was not ready to let go of. Someone who has made a huge, positive impact and is someone that I had the pleasure of getting to know and who turned an otherwise cool and calm person into a 15 year old blithering idiot ( in a good way of course).

Needless to say the last 72 hours have been...interesting at best but they haven't been without good times and at least a little self reflection.

Now that I am about to board my first of many flights in my 26 hour journey around the world my mood is hesitant at best. Trust me I'm fully aware of the fact that this opportunity to live in Sydney and work with Fleishman-Hillard is once in a lifetime. I also know that it will do wonders for me in terms of a future career as well as expanding my somewhat limited knowledge of the public relations world as well as being oh I don't know...one hell of an experience. Again, trust me, I know what this opportunity is and what it will bring but that doesn't mean that my mind and heart aren't somewhere else at this very moment. Thats not to say that I'm not going to do my best and dive into this experience head first and soak up as much of it that I can.

That said, I am going to board the flight bound for the ever illustrious Dallas Fort Worth for a four hour layover, exciting stuff I know.

Be back soon...